Let Me Hold You Longer
Written by Best-Selling Author (and mother of 6 children)
Karen Kingsbury
Illustrated by
Mary Collier
Long ago you came to me,
a miracle of firsts:
First smiles and teeth and baby steps,
a sunbeam on the burst.
But one day you will move away
and leave to me your past,
And I will be left thinking of
a lifetime of your lasts…
The last time that I held a bottle
to your baby lips.
The last time that I lifted you
and held you on my hip.
The last night when you woke up crying,
needing to be walked,
When last you crawled up with you blanket,
wanting to be rocked.
The last time when you ran to me,
still small enough to hold.
The last time that you said you’d marry
me when you grew old.
Precious, simple moments and
bright flashes from your past-
Would I have held on longer if
I’d known they were you last?
Our last adventure to the park,
your final midday nap,
The last time when you wore your favorite
faded baseball cap.
Your last few hours of kindergarten,
those last days of first grade,
Your last at bat in Little League,
last colored picture made.
I never said good-bye to all
your yesterdays long passed.
So what about tomorrow-
will I recognize your lasts?
The last time that you catch a frog
in that old backyard pond.
The last time that you run barefoot
across our fresh-cut lawn.
Silly, scattered images
will represent your past.
I keep on taking pictures,
never quite sure of your lasts…
The last time that I comb your hair
or stop a pillow fight.
The last time that I pray with you
and tuck you in at night.
The last time when we cuddle
with a book, just me and you.
The last time you jump in our bed
and sleep between us two.
The last piano lesson,
last vacation to the lake.
Your last few weeks of middle school,
last soccer goal you make.
I look ahead and dream of days
that haven’t come to pass.
But as I do, I sometimes miss
today’s sweet, precious lasts…
The last time that I help you with
a math or spelling test.
The last time when I shout that yes,
your room is still a mess.
The last time that you need me for
a ride from here to there.
The last time that you spend the night
with your old tattered bear.
My life keeps moving faster,
stealing precious days that pass.
I want to hold on longer-
want to recognize your lasts…
The last time that you need my help
with details of a dance.
The last time that you ask me for
advice about romance.
The last time that you talk to me
about your hopes and dreams.
The last time that you wear a jersey
for your high school team.
I’ve watched you grow and barely noticed
seasons as they pass.
If I could freeze the hands of time,
I’d hold on your lasts.
For come some bright fall morning,
you’ll be going far away.
College life will beckon
in a brilliant sort of way.
One last hug, on last good-bye,
one quick and hurried kiss.
One last time to understand
just how much you’ll be missed.
I’ll watch you leave and think how fast
our time together passed.
Let me hold on longer, God,
to every precious last.
With recent happenings in my life and in my family I realize the lasts are just as important if not more so than the firsts and we can never take anything for granted. Please please PLEASE remember how precious, short, and miraculous this life, and every given day, is. I can't imagine not having my little angel to hold one more time, or to kiss me, or to say sorry for throwing tantrums, or to bark like a dog when she hears a dog, or to help me move the chairs out of the kitchen so I can sweep, or to grab my finger to help her walk across the beam and jump on the trampoline, or to throw food on the floor so she can say "uh oh" and make me pick it up, just to do it again, or to dance with Pooh, who is bigger than she is, because she knows how it makes her feel when momma and daddy dance with her, or to make messes, or to help clean the appliances with a rag because she sees momma do it, or to walk around the house jabbering on her phone, laughing as though she is having a conversation with someone and they just said something funny, or to only cuddle with you when she is sick, which makes her being sick so much more bearable, or any of the other lasts that will happen in her life, along with all of her firsts.
I love you so much little Ryah and I hope that your daddy can see why I don't get everything in the house clean, dinner made, and laundry done somedays because I would rather take that time to spend playing, reading, dancing, laughing, with you, chasing you around the house, and cleaning up your messes, because that is what really makes me happy.
Thanks Stephanie for introducing this book to me. Everyone should have this book.